An image from this day: Taken on this day in 2019 on the Indonesian island of Bali, where there were very few cloudy days during the time spent. Almost every day was delightfully warm (some might say far too much so) with relentless rays of glorious sunshine.
Wednesday 11th March 2020
One might term the first example delusion and the second example paranoia. Either way, the human would have coloured their reality to the extent that they were fooling themselves. There’s nothing wrong with being mistaken, of course. However, when being mistaken is a result of egoic projection, it can be beneficial to examine it and learn to let go.
What we will find if we examine these two projections of reality is that the one who is trying to avoid conflict, through convincing themselves that they’re the only person with whom their partner is frequently intimate, is avoiding the issue as a defence mechanism. The one who is trying to catch their partner doing something they’re not even doing is also using a defence mechanism, although this postulation might initially seem counterintuitive. Whilst the first wants to avoid falling victim to feelings of inadequacy, rejection, despair, shame, or any number of other emotional states through discovering infidelity, the second wants to avoid being the victim by predicting and pre-empting an attack of these potentially destructive feelings.
It would be difficult for a lot of people to accept that the potential “victim” has absolute autonomy over how they respond, in any event. It might be more difficult for a person who was suffering from depression, anxiety, outbursts of violence, or any number of other behaviours associated with psychological disorder, to admit that they were solely responsible for their behaviour.
Someone who is empowered with awareness could recognise the disruption brought about by the infidelity, realise that their partner was cheating and calmly confront them. Someone empowered with awareness would either know that their partner wasn’t cheating on them, or at least be self-assured enough to remain calm in their own conviction that, if it occurred to them that something felt uncomfortable, they could be open with their partner about their concerns.
What will the deluded one do when they finally get to the point where they can’t continue to hide the obvious from themselves? There will be suffering. What will the paranoid one do when they think they’ve found the “evidence”? Whatever they do, there will be suffering.
It doesn’t have to be that way, though. To suffer is a choice. Internal conflict is no exception. That is not to trivialise the events that lead people into suffering. They are as much part of reality as the individual affected by them. However, identifying with the feelings that arise from such circumstances is the third common blunder most humans tend to make in this particular process. The blunder that precedes it is the perception that we are obliged to react in particular ways to feelings we have labelled. The first blunder is focussing on the label. When we realise that we have a lump in our throat and butterflies in our stomach, we might label it “anxiety”. In another context we might call it “excitement”. Similar sensations arise before being labelled “aroused”, “sickened”, “overwhelmed”, “ecstatic”, or any number of other feelings.
A track from this day: Skitz alongside Roots Manuva – Where My Mind Is At (single: Ronin Records, 1996; featured on the Skitz album Homegrown, 2004). So many lines from this track resonated when they were first encountered and do so no less now. “Don’t care ’bout your assumptions, I will not be pigeonholed” is a strongly resonant sentiment, but not quite as sumptuous a lyrics as, “Nice, my mind state, bringing flames to my throat, as I float I bust quotes from my inner mind’s page. Pure genius.
The full Sunny This Position playlist can be found on the Guerrilla Nature YouTube channel, which can be found at the following link:
https://www.youtube.com/@GuerrillaNature
And on Spotify at the following link: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4VHLzupQ2vvR9xMfcIxyZC?si=T-SjjKOfSPiDRS31HBSeRA&utm_source=copy-link
This day’s video: Shunryu Suzuki Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind narrated on YouTube at the link below https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3vDfq1Yt5to&list=PLX1VcN8ZaJNXMeuZ0m_Q93eS0qLXsL-I-&index=7&t=793s
Today’s featured creator: Rooby has co-created a beautiful son, who shows great promise in his awareness and intelligence, as well as being a kind and considerate human. In this way, Rooby is reflected in him. A very spiritual being, Rooby generally creates positive effects as standard procedure by simply being open and aware, without having to think much about it most of the time. Not everyone highlighted in this feature section will necessarily be well established at everything they do. Rooby is a great lover of music. She is particularly interested in and knowledgeable about the dub and other related scenes, largely in her home town of Leicester, but she will also travel a long way for a good event. After years of happily contributing to proceedings as an consumer, she is ready to put her knowledge, experience and passion into becoming a musical creator. No doubt she’ll be great at it!
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Today’s quote: “People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.” – Thich Nhat Hanh (Fragrant Palm Leaves, Riverhead Books, New York 1998)
https://www.spiritualityandpractice.com/quotes/quotations/view/11689/spiritual-quotation
Above: Sunny this Position entry 2020-03-11
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